Mastering Feedback with the SBI Model: A Framework for Growth and Trust | Ep #125

Speaker A: Okay, let's talk about feedback. How many times have you tried to give feedback? Maybe, uh, especially the constructive kind, you know, when performance needs a bit of an adjustment and you just watch the other person immediately put up that defensive wall.

Speaker B: Oh yeah, it happens all the time. It's really frustrating, isn't it?

Speaker A: It is, yeah. Because you're genuinely trying to help. You want to inspire real growth, but somehow the conversation just lands completely wrong.

Speaker B: Right. And you wonder, why do some leaders seem to navigate this so smoothly? They get through the resistance, they inspire

Speaker A: action, while the rest of us kind of struggle.

Speaker B: Exactly.

Speaker A: Well, welcome to this deep dive.

Speaker B: Glad to be here.

Speaker A: Today we're really digging into the mechanics of effective communication because honestly, it's such a foundational skill for any leader.

Speaker B: Absolutely critical.

Speaker A: This is building better managers. And we're produced by new level work. They're a company really focused on building exceptional leaders, you know, at all levels, within organizations.

Speaker B: And our mission today, for you, listening, is really to move beyond just, well, generic advice. We want to equip you with a precise, pretty powerful framework.

Speaker A: Right.

Speaker B: We're focusing on a specific tool that helps ensure your feedback, whether it's constructive or positive, is, uh, consistent, really specific, and feels authentic.

Speaker A: Makes sense.

Speaker B: Yeah. The main goal here is to help you cultivate lasting positive behavior in your teams and honestly, to awaken those leadership traits that might be lying dormant.

Speaker A: Okay, let's unpack that. So this tool, the sort of shortcut you mentioned. Yeah, that's the SBI model. Right. Situation, behavior, impact.

Speaker B: That's the one. Sbi. It's a really easy to remember structure and it's fantastic for pretty much any feedback conversation you need to have.

Speaker A: So why, I mean, stepping back, why is feedback so important? Is it really more than just a performance review checkbox?

Speaker B: Oh, absolutely. It's so much more. Look, consistent, high quality feedback isn't just nice to have. It's a vital form of communication. When you deliver it with, um, genuine honesty and respect, it does several things. It actually advances performance, it boosts business results.

Speaker A: Okay, the practical side, yeah.

Speaker B: But crucially, it also builds self esteem and trust within the team. That's how you foster a culture where people want to learn and grow continuously instead of, you know, a culture of fear or just stagnation.

Speaker A: It really is the currency of high performing teams, isn't it? And that opportunity for managers to grow people, awaken leadership. It totally hinges on being consistent, specific and authentic in how you communicate.

Speaker B: You really can't delegate that responsibility away, no way. And that's where the SBI model. That consistency piece really helps. It's adapted from work by the center for Creative Leadership and it's just a simple mnemonic situation, behavior impact. It gives you that structure so you don't accidentally fall back on vague, maybe judgmental comments like know you just need to be more proactive. What does that even mean?

Speaker A: Yeah, that's useless feedback.

Speaker B: Yeah.

Speaker A: Okay, so here's where I think it gets really interesting. Especially with constructive feedback. That's always the trickiest, the riskiest maybe.

Speaker B: Definitely feels that way.

Speaker A: Sometimes we need to sort of shift our mindset. Right? It's not really about correcting behavior, it's more about increasing awareness.

Speaker B: Exactly. That awareness piece is paramount. Think about it. You can't consciously change habits or actions if you're not even aware you're doing them or aware of their impact.

Speaker A: Makes total sense. Uh, so if we're thinking practically logistics, timing matters here, doesn't it?

Speaker B: Timing is crucial. You generally want to address the behavior you're concerned about as soon as reasonable possible while the situation is still fresh in everyone's mind. Okay, but and this is a huge caveat, never ever deliver constructive feedback if you're feeling angry or upset.

Speaker A: Right.

Speaker B: Bad idea, terrible idea. Just wait, take a break, calm down, regain your composure.

Speaker A: Because the second that strong emotion takes over, it stops being coaching and it just feels like criticism. Right. And you lose all the trust you might have built.

Speaker B: Precisely. When you wait until you're calm, you ensure the feedback comes from a place of, uh, professional objectivity. You're focusing on the impact of the behavior, not making it personal about the person.

Speaker A: That composure piece feels non negotiable for it to work.

Speaker B: It really is. So okay, let's get practical. Let's break down the actual steps for delivering constructive feedback using sbi. And remember, the goal isn't a lecture. It has to be a two way street. A conversation focused on finding solutions. Okay.

Speaker A: Step by step. What's first?

Speaker B: Step one is maybe the most important for lowering that defensiveness we talked about. Invite reflection first.

Speaker A: Uh, okay, so don't just jump in with what you saw.

Speaker B: No. Start by asking the team member for their perspective on what happened. So instead of listing their mistakes, you might say something like, hey, regarding that presentation to the stakeholders yesterday, what were your observations? How do you think that conversation went?

Speaker A: That uh, gives them a chance to self assess first. I like that. It gives them some agency.

Speaker B: Exactly. And once they've shared their view, and maybe they'll bring up something you didn't even realize, then you move to Step two, Seek permission.

Speaker A: Seek permission. How does that work?

Speaker B: You offer your own observations, but you ask if they're actually ready and open to hearing them. Something like, okay, thanks for sharing that. I have a few observations about the situation too, Things I think might be helpful. Are you open to hearing that feedback right now?

Speaker A: Hmm. That M feels very respectful.

Speaker B: Mhm.

Speaker A: It ensures they're actually listening, not just bracing for impact.

Speaker B: Yeah, but I can hear some managers thinking, won't that sound kind of forced, like some corporate script? And what if they actually say no?

Speaker A: That's a fair challenge. Look, authenticity matters. So you adapt the wording to your style.

Speaker B: Mhm.

Speaker A: But the principle of asking is key. If they say no, you respect that, but you immediately reschedule. Uh, it signals, look, this conversation is important, we need to have it. But I respect your headspace right now. But honestly, if you've done step one well and vitted their reflection, you've usually built enough psychological safety that they are ready to listen.

Speaker B: That makes sense. That psychological safety really is the foundation, isn't it?

Speaker A: Totally. Okay, so they've reflected, they've said yes. Now step three, deliver the SBI feedback itself.

Speaker B: Right. And this is where you need to be candid, direct, but most importantly, specific. Let's maybe use an example that's a bit higher stakes, something relevant for managers listening. And let's focus not just on hurt feelings, but tie it to the business impact.

Speaker A: Good call. So the SBI template is basically, when you did X situation behavior, why have an impact?

Speaker B: Yep.

Speaker A: So an example might be, uh, in last Thursday's planning session situation, you decided to pull two team members onto that new unscheduled project without discussing it first behavior.

Speaker B: Okay, specific behavior.

Speaker A: The impact was that we then missed the deadline for the quarterly compliance audit, which is a serious issue. Business impact. And um, it also left those two team members with conflicting priorities, which kind of lowered morale. Emotional team impact.

Speaker B: See that clarity is powerful. You're linking the specific action, pulling the team members directly to a measurable consequence. The missed deadline and an emotional one. The morale dip. That's what makes the feedback stick.

Speaker A: Right. Without that I for impact, it just sounds like you're complaining or judging them.

Speaker B: Exactly. It moves it from opinion to observation of consequence.

Speaker A: Okay, so that's S B and I delivered. What's the final step? Step four.

Speaker B: Step four is guidance and follow up. But crucially, this needs to be solution focused and really center on their ownership of the solution. Don't just jump in and tell them what to do.

Speaker A: Ah, okay. Coach them towards it.

Speaker B: Yes. Ask questions. Things like. Okay, so given that impact, what steps do you think you could take to make sure this kind of priority conflict doesn't happen again?

Speaker A: Right. Or what sort of time frame seems realistic for making those changes?

Speaker B: How can I support you in doing that? Are there any obstacles I can help remove or even reflect? Reflecting back what worked in that situation, what didn't, what might you do differently next time?

Speaker A: Asking those what might you do differently questions really drives home the accountability and keeps it focused on moving forward. That feels like real coaching.

Speaker B: It is. That's the goal.

Speaker A: Okay, this is super helpful for the tough conversations, but let's, uh, let's shift gears a bit. We can't spend all our energy just fixing problems. We also need to reinforce what's going well. Right? Positive feedback.

Speaker B: Oh, absolutely. Critical, effective positive feedback is just as vital, maybe even more so in some ways.

Speaker A: Why is that?

Speaker B: Well, for a start, it reinforces positive behaviors. It helps turn those good actions into consistent habits. It builds trust like crazy. And it directly shows your team members that you actually see and value their efforts.

Speaker A: Yeah, that recognition piece is huge. It inspires that self leadership doesn't. It makes people want to take ownership.

Speaker B: It really does. And what's truly fascinating here is the neuroscience behind it. There's actual brain chemistry involved.

Speaker A: Oh really? Tell me more.

Speaker B: Okay, so when we give or receive genuine positive feedback, our brains release dopamine.

Speaker A: The feel good chemical.

Speaker B: Exactly. It's a powerful neurotransmitter linked to pleasure, reward, motivation. And when it's released in the receiver's brain after they've done something well and been recognized for, uh, actually strengthens the neural pathways associated with that positive behavior. It literally makes them more likely to repeat it because the brain says, hey, that felt good. Do that again.

Speaker A: Wow. Okay, so positive feedback is literally wiring their brain for success?

Speaker B: In a way, yes. Consistent, sincere positive feedback leads to healthier habits and higher performance. But here's something often missed.

Speaker A: What's that?

Speaker B: The benefit isn't just for the receiver. The dopamine release happens in the giver's brain too.

Speaker A: No kidding. So I, I feel good giving positive feedback.

Speaker B: Yes. When you as a manager give sincere praise and see that positive reaction, that act of giving feedback becomes rewarding for you as well. Uh, it creates this positive feedback loop. It reinforces your behavior of engaging positively with your team, which leads to you being a better, more engaged leader overall.

Speaker A: It's a win win that's actually quite powerful. So giving positive feedback is like self reinforcing leadership optimization.

Speaker B: I like that. Yeah, you could definitely frame it that way.

Speaker A: Okay, so if it's that benefic, we should probably be as intentional about positive feedback as we are about constructive. Are there steps for doing positive sbi well to maximize that, uh, neurological benefit?

Speaker B: Absolutely. It mirrors the constructive process and structure, but the tone is obviously different. Four steps again.

Speaker A: Okay, lay them out for us.

Speaker B: Step one, Describe the situation. Be specific. Anchor the praise. In reality, don't just say you're doing great. Say during the Q3 project review presentation to the VP of Finance yesterday morning. Context matters, right?

Speaker A: Verifiable detail. Step 2.

Speaker B: Step 2. Share the specific behavior or the positive actions you observed or maybe heard about from a reliable source. Again, specifics, not just you are great, but you proactively address those three potential budget sticking points before the VP even had a chance to raise them.

Speaker A: Okay? Clear action. Step three.

Speaker B: Step three. Detail the specific positive impact of their behavior. Connect their action to a successful outcome. So you might say, because you frontloaded that information and handled those concerns proactively, the Entire presentation finished 10 minutes early. We avoided any unnecessary friction. And guess what? We secured immediate sign off on that budget increase we needed.

Speaker A: Wow. The difference between just saying good job in the meeting and that detailed breakdown is, well, it's night and day, isn't it?

Speaker B: Huge difference. The specificity makes it meaningful and memorable. And finally, step four. Formally express appreciation. This is where you can connect the action to their positive personal qualities. Acknowledge the effort, their skills.

Speaker A: How would that sound?

Speaker B: Um, something like, I really appreciate your strategic foresight and how prepared you were for that meeting. That's exactly the kind of ownership and proactive thinking we need at this level. It reinforces their belief in their own capabilities.

Speaker A: Okay. Situation, behavior, impact, appreciation for positive feedback. Got it?

Speaker B: Yeah.

Speaker A: So, pulling all this together, uh, what does this all mean for the manager listening right now? What are the absolute must dos?

Speaker B: Right, the quick takeaways. If we synthesize everything, successful feedback delivery, whether it's constructive or positive, really boils down to a few critical elements.

Speaker A: Okay.

Speaker B: One, Your feedback has to be consistent, specific and authentic. Consistency makes it normal, not a scary surprise. Specificity makes it actionable. Authenticity makes it believable.

Speaker A: Makes sense.

Speaker B: Two, maintain your emotional composure, especially when it's constructive feedback. Never deliver it angry. Wait until you're calm, non negotiable. 3, 3. Ensure the conversation is genuinely two way. It's not a monologue. Use active listening. Ask questions. Understand their perspective before you jump to

Speaker A: conclusions or solutions crucial for trust.

Speaker B: And four and four, Always, always, always connect the behavior to the impact. Whether it's a positive impact you want more of or a negative impact that

Speaker A: needs to change that connection behavior to impact. Feels like the secret sauce, doesn't it? Yeah. It shifts the focus from judging the person to discussing the results of their actions.

Speaker B: Precisely. It makes it objective about the work, not about their personality. And mastering this SBI model, really practicing it transforms feedback from this, like, dreaded obligation.

Speaker A: Yeah.

Speaker B: Into a genuinely powerful tool. A tool for cultivating leaders on your team, for boosting the whole organization's results, and for building a team culture based on trust and growth.

Speaker A: That really wraps up our deep dive into the SBI framework nicely. We've seen how having this structure, situation, behavior, impact gives you the scaffolding you need for those tough conversations, but also for celebrating the wins that build momentum.

Speaker B: It really does provide that clarity and confidence.

Speaker A: So for everyone listening, if you're thinking

Speaker B: about how to bring these kinds of structured insights, maybe human led coaching or team development programs, often enhanced by data and AI these days, to your own leaders, you should reach out to new level work to learn more. They really specialize in building better leaders at all levels. It's a natural next step if this resonates.

Speaker A: Absolutely. Well, thank you for joining us for this deep dive on building better managers produced by new level work.

Speaker B: Pleasure to be here.

Speaker A: Now, before we go, here's maybe a final thought for you to go on this week. Think about your own feedback habits. How much of your current feedback focuses only on closing gaps, the constructive side, versus how much focuses on reinforcing strengths, the positive side? Uh, yeah, because the research actually suggests that the most effective leaders, they spend significantly more time reinforcing success than they do correcting mistakes. So just ask yourself, what does your current balance look like? Something to think about.