The Leadership Skills Midlife Women Entrepreneurs Need to Stop Being the Bottleneck by Creating a Culture of Team Accountability

Speaker A: In this episode, you'll discover the leadership skills that stop you from being the bottleneck in your business by building a culture of team accountability. Welcome to Burnout Proof Leadership, a podcast for midlife women in online business who've hit a revenue ceiling and are ready to stop doing it all. To step into your true leader identity and build a business that can grow without you running everything from the midd.

Speaker B: Happy Polarity Spotlight Friday.

Speaker A: This is Tracy and Michelle, your polarity power pair. In these Polarity Spotlight episodes, we shine a light on the polarities that shape your leadership, business, and life. Now, have you ever felt frustrated because a team member missed a deadline, dropped the ball, or didn't meet your expectations? And suddenly it became harder to feel connected to them? Especially when it happens right before you launch a program or your content has to get out the door in a timely manner. Or maybe you've bent over backward to be supportive and understanding, only to realize accountability started slipping and performance suffered. If you're building a virtual team, especially across different states, countries, and cultures, this is a leadership challenge you cannot afford to ignore.

Speaker B: Yeah, so today we're spotlighting polarity that's had a profound impact on the way we lead our virtual team. And it's kind of called conditional respect and unconditional respect. Now, conditional respect, this is recognition, honor, acknowledgement, and it's based on a person's ability to meet expectations or commitments or standards. It's respect connected to performance and behavior.

Speaker A: An unconditional respect is recognition, honor, or acknowledgement based on a person's inherent worth and humanity. It is respect for the person, regardless of performance. And healthy leadership requires both.

Speaker B: Sure does. And one thing we've observed working with virtual team members, you know, from different countries and across the United States, is that unconditional respect isn't always expected. Many people enter online work environments believing their value comes entirely from what they produce. So if they perform well, then, well, they're appreciated. And if they struggle, then they're considered replaceable. So, unfortunately, many virtual assistants and contractors have experienced work relationships that really feel transactional in nature. They're hired for their output and measured by their productivity. And often they're treated like a task doer rather than a human being. One of our virtual team members, actually, we hired a few years ago. She just couldn't believe that she found us. You know, she shared she was so nervous because it was her first VA job and, you know, and she had heard horror stories about how VAs were treated. She said, I couldn't believe that this kind of leadership and support was possible. And, you know, this new team member is incredibly invaluable to us. And there's just so much mutual respect. And she manages a lot of our projects and our full team and leverages conditional and unconditional respect with them every day as well. And that's why this, this polarity matters so much and is so important. You know, as leaders, we have an opportunity to create something different.

Speaker A: So when leaders over focus on conditional respect, people begin to feel like their value depends on their performance. Mistakes become threatening, problems get hidden, people stop asking for help, and team culture starts to feel transactional.

Speaker B: And you know, leaders can over focus on unconditional respect as well, and accountability can disappear. So difficult conversations just get delayed. Standards become really unclear. The same issues keep repeating over and over and over. And people feel cared for, but really not challenged. And healthy teams have to have both.

Speaker A: So here's something we've discovered over the years. The better we leverage this polarity, the less we have to be the doer in our business. And if you're listening today as a woman entrepreneur who feels like everybody, everything still depends on you, pay attention to this one, because this may be one of the reasons you're stuck.

Speaker B: Yeah. And you know, as business owners, you know, you want to lead your business and you know, you don't want to operate as the all star player all the time, but oftentimes you are. And so, you know, you're still checking everything, you're still fixing everything, you're rescuing everybody, you're redoing work and you're making all the decisions and eventually you become a bottleneck.

Speaker A: And the reality is that winning teams require people who take pride in being the doer themselves, People who genuinely own their responsibilities, people who want to excel, people who don't need to be rescued. And the kind of ownership that doesn't happen by accident. It develops in a culture where both accountability and dignity exist.

Speaker B: Now, when team members experience unconditional respect, uh, they feel safe enough to learn, to grow, to take initiative, to try things. And when they experience conditional respect, they understand that excellence, follow through and accountability matter. So together that creates ownership. And ownership is what allows leaders to let go.

Speaker A: So think about the best head coaches of winning teams. We love a, uh, great head coach. You know, they're not running onto the field to play every position. They're developing players, creating clarity, building trust, holding standards, providing feedback, and helping people perform at their highest level. Great coaches are masters at leveraging this polarity.

Speaker B: So if your goal is to move from being the all star player to becoming the head coach of your business. This polarity is not optional. It's working on you and around you all the time. Because people take pride in ownership when they know to the things. My leader believes in me as a person and my leader believes I'm capable of excellence. That's where great team culture is built.

Speaker A: Now there are some signs if you're over focusing unconditional respect, you might notice these early warning signs. You may start to hear a trend of, you know, I just didn't think that was a big deal or other reasons for not bringing things missed forward. Or you start to be surprised by the number of things you have to discover yourself that are not being done correctly or team members just keep conversations brief.

Speaker B: Now if you're over focusing on, uh, unconditional respect, here's a few early warning signs to really be watching for. Constant apologies for work, being late or not done. Okay. To push meetings off, you know, just keep pushing that kick that can down the road. And if you have to go over the same thing multiple, multiple times just isn't sinking in. Those are early signals that one poll is being overemphasized.

Speaker A: And here is the question we'd leave with you today. Does your team clearly understand that their value as a human being and their accountability as a team member are two different things? Because healthy cultures make both of those truths visible.

Speaker B: Yeah. And the greater purpose of leveraging conditional respect and unconditional respect, well, it's creating a culture where people feel deeply valued as human beings while being empowered to perform at their very highest level. Now Kim Scott, the author of Radical Candor, says caring personally while challenging directly is the essence of good leadership.

Speaker A: And that's exactly what leveraging conditional respect and unconditional respect looks like. We care deeply about the people on our team because of who they are, not just what they do. And because we care, we're willing to have the conversations that help them grow, succeed, and contribute at their highest level.

Speaker B: Now, uh, when you separate a person's worth from their performance, you create a culture where people feel valued, accountable and empowered. So that's today's polarity. Spotlight. We'll see you next Friday. And until then, stay burnout proof and keep leading both sides. Sam? Mhm.