How Speaking Up about Workload Builds Influence for Women Leaders

S3 Ep 4 - [Bold Move 5 Stop Taking on Too Much] (audio) Liz Boswell: Hi, and welcome back to Making Bold Moves. This is Liz, and if you're joining me today while you are having a walk, taking some time getting some head space, I'm really pleased that you're making time for yourself because today we're on Bold Move number five, stop taking on too much and trying to do everything yourself. And this is a really important one because it's where I see a lot of capable leaders quietly edging towards burnout without realising how they got there.

And I've absolutely been guilty of this one myself as well. I've said yes because it felt too quick. I've tried to do things myself because, you know, let's face it, no one else is gonna do it anywhere near as good as you. I always thought, well, it'll be done properly if I just do it, and it'll only take two minutes.

And before I realised it, I was busy all the time, but I was stretched, tired and carrying far more than I needed to. So let's look at what's really going on then when we are taking on too much. I think from my experience when I'm coaching people who are taking on too much, they're not bad necessarily at prioritising. What it is, is they're protective, and I've come across a lot of this with women that they care about standards.

They care about quality and making sure things are right, and they also really care about people and they don't want to add the pressure that they're feeling to other people, so they hold it onto it themselves. So that protection comes at a cost because it means that while we're protecting other people and holding onto everything that's building up and building up and building up inside of us as well. And that's where we slowly move towards burnout. And I think this is an issue for leadership teams in lots of businesses where leaders and managers just physically can't handle anymore.

I worked with one leader, in particular, who came to me completely overwhelmed. She was genuinely on the verge of burnout. And when we talked about delegation, she said, I cannot delegate to my team. They're already way too busy, and I was curious to know where this was coming from.

So I asked her a question and I just said, do you know that for sure? Or are you assuming? And that question made her think. It stopped her because she worked through it and she realised that she was protecting her team without actually checking what was true.

And I think when we have felt that pressure and lowered ourselves, when we know what it feels like to have too much on - feel stressed, feel like you can't manage - we don't want to inflict that on other people. So it's often an emotional decision that we make to hold onto it ourselves. And this client, in particular, she did something really, really important and really brave. She went and sat down and had one-to-ones with each person in her team.

And she asked them about their workload, how they were managing, how they were prioritising and what they had on. And what she discovered was massively surprising to her, she found that, yes, some people in her team were stretched, but others were actually very quiet. They didn't have a lot on at all, and in actual fact, they were a little bit worried why they weren't being given more work. They were assuming that it was because she didn't think they could cope or she didn't think they were good enough.

So then they were questioning themselves, purely because she wasn't passing that responsibility onto them. And so they were second-guessing their future in that role. And I think, you know, if she hadn't had those conversations, they might have eventually disengaged or even left the business. It was that important.

So instead, because she had those conversations, understood where her team were, what they had on, what they were willing to take on, she was then able to delegate strategically. She gave work to people who wanted it and would do it well. She also gave some to people who wanted a challenge and wanted to stretch themselves. They stepped up.

And, you know, actually develop themselves, took on a bit more responsibility. And of course they didn't do it perfectly the first time, but she supported them through that. They were able to take on projects and she was able to let go of some really big things. She was delegating them to go to certain meetings and it meant that it really freed up a massive amount of her time.

So the outcome from this was that her team became much more engaged. She had that space to think again. And because they stepped up and she could see what they were capable of, her trust in them grew as well, which meant that she delegated even more to them, and it was a massive breakthrough, and it finally made her realise as well, that delegation, isn't it about dumping on people, it's about developing people. I've had to learn this in my business as well and think about as a business owner, I'm wearing all these hats, a marketing hat, the finance hat, the sales hat the delivery hat, the coach, and it's just too much.

And there was a point where I was just involved in everything. And not necessarily because I needed to be, but I felt like as a business owner that was what you did, that you had to struggle. And I didn't realise that there were things that only I should be doing and that it was possible to delegate to other people. Even though I'm the only one in the business and I don't have a team.

I started looking at ways that I could let go because I had to. It came from necessity, and so I started to use freelancers. I started to let go of the finance hat and leave all that up to my accountant and trust her to do that. I started working with an online business manager who helped me with my systems and all of the digital side of the business.

And some of the key areas as well, and it just freed up a lot of my time to focus on growing the business, scaling the business, managing key relationships, and the quality and standards in the business didn't drop. In fact, if anything, it improved in some cases because other people were far better at it than I was, to be honest, and I was trying to fumble my way along. But actually, delegating to people who were really good at it, who was, that was their strength and they loved doing it.

That worked a lot better, and helped me to focus on doing the things that I loved and that I was really good at. So here's the whole principle then that I want you to remember. Prioritisation is not about doing more. It's not about taking on more.

It's certainly not about writing a to-do list and ticking things off. It's about deciding what are the things that, in the role that you are in only you should be doing, and everything else becomes a delegation decision. So here's how you are gonna stop taking on too much then over to you now, and I promise you there is a way that you can do this without lowering standards or overwhelming your team. So here's three ways.

So firstly, number one, get clear on what only you are accountable for. So ask yourself this question; if this was the only thing I achieved this week, would it still count as a good week? Would I still feel like I've made progress? If not, then it might not be that important.

It might be something that needs doing but it's probably not your priority, could it wait until next week? Number two, delegate based on capability and capacity, not assumption. So instead of just thinking that people are too busy, ask. Use one-to-ones to understand workload properly.

Have a proper conversation with them. Don't just send them an email and say, have you got time to take this on? Sit down and talk to them about it. Or if you can't sit down with them, if you're working remotely, do it over Teams.

But understanding what they're good at, what they like doing, what they'd like to get better at, what they'd like to do more of, and delegate those tasks to them that will make you feel good about delegating it as well. And also they will do it in a way that is, you know, good for them and good for you to. So number three is delegate to outcomes, not just tasks. So this is important for a number of ways.

Because we want people to understand the value of what they are doing. So when we're asking people, if we say, right, okay, can you prepare this report for us, and some people think, oh gosh, yeah, it's gonna take me ages and it'll be really boring. So we need to explain the purpose of the report. If we say, actually, you know what?

It's really important that we have this report because we're going for a bid for some new funding for our business, and this report can really help us to put forward how well we're doing in these areas at the moment, share the data and it could mean that we're more likely to get the funding instead of just saying, can you write this report for me? Can you see the difference? So we say, right, the outcome is that we need the report to give really clearly, the key data, the key results in this area, and we need it to be short to the point.

And we want the data to really pop for people as well. Something along these lines, you get the idea. Give a real clarity on what the outcome needs to be, not just the task. So then once you give a clear understanding of the outcome, you can then ask, how would you approach it?

Ask them to tell you. Don't say to them, oh, you need to go to PowerPoint, create a PowerPoint presentation, make six slides. You know, that's on the verge of micromanaging, isn't it? There might be a way that you normally do it, but they might approach it a totally different way.

They might be using Canva or some whole other programme or some other way of doing it that would do it quicker, would make it more attractive, make it more presentable, so give them that ownership because that's what it does when you delegate outcomes. It builds ownership, not dependency. So let's just pause for a moment then and think about you and your workload. Think about some of the things that you've got on at the moment and your team.

Why are you protecting people without actually checking whether they need your protection? What are you carrying because you can, not because you should? And what would change if you trusted your team a bit more and trusted yourself to let go? Now I know letting go is really uncomfortable and it feels awkward.

Maybe you worry that things won't be done as well, or that you're gonna overload people. But remember, assuming capacity is often more damaging than having that honest conversation because once you've got that clarity, it builds trust on both sides. So here's a weekly challenge for you then for this week ahead, pick one piece of work that you do regularly and ask yourself, does this really need to be me or could it be a development opportunity for someone else? And I'm gonna challenge you to pick something big.

Pick something that takes a lot of your time and needs a lot of thinking, and that if you let it go, could really make a difference to you long-term. Once you've chosen it, pick a person who you think would be the right person with the right strengths, the right capability to take that on and have the conversation. That's it. That's your challenge for this week.

Find one's piece of work, delegate it, let it go. And this is the thing here; we're stopping taking on too much, doesn't mean abandoning responsibility. We can still follow up, check in with people, see how they're getting on. It means that you're leading at the right level.

You're leading people to achieve results. Leaders who delegate well don't lose control. They build stronger, more capable teams. So let's just recap this episode then before we finish.

Taking on too much often comes with care and doesn't mean that you're badly organised. It just means that, you know, you need to think about what your priorities are. Prioritisation starts with accountability. Protecting people without checking can backfire; and delegation builds capability, trust, and space to think.

That's Bold Move number five, Stop Taking on Too Much. If you want the full Bold Moves Roadmap, you can find it at our website. And if you know someone who's brilliant and could really benefit from listening to this, don't forget to pass it on. I'll see you next time for Quietening Your Inner Critic and Why It Can Get Louder As Responsibility Grows.

See you then. Bye.