NORTHBOUND: Executive Leadership Coaching · 2026-02-09 · 11 min
Key moments - from our scoring
Substance score
14 / 100
Five dimensions, 20 points each
The episode reframes a common workplace platitude - focusing on what you can control - as potentially problematic advice when used to justify passivity. Chris distinguishes between control (forcing outcomes) and agency (choosing intentional actions with constraints), arguing that leaders often fall into one of two traps: either surrendering to the sidelines by labeling everything outside their control, or attempting to micromanage every outcome. Both approaches produce identical negative results: stress, burnout, and disengagement. Instead, Chris advocates identifying what genuinely remains within your span of control - your responses, communication with leadership, personal expectations, learning, and boundaries - while also taking responsible action on issues typically dismissed as "out of my wheelhouse," such as organizational direction, budgets, technology changes, and toxic behavior. The episode emphasizes that genuine leadership involves providing feedback on issues that affect you, setting boundaries around dysfunction, and encouraging others rather than remaining silent on the sidelines. Chris uses practical examples like addressing a toxic boss directly, offering feedback on organizational direction, and seeking personal feedback before performance reviews to illustrate how to move from passive acceptance to active agency.
Control means forcing outcomes and dictating what happens, while agency means choosing intentional actions within constraints, empowering yourself and others, and managing your own responses. The goal is agency, not control.
Yes, but not as a blanket excuse to avoid hard conversations or boundary-setting. What's always in your control includes your responses, communication, expectations, learning, and boundaries. Labeling toxic behavior or feedback opportunities as "outside your control" is a cop-out.
Give direct feedback to them, not to others. Tell them specifically what behavior you don't appreciate rather than gossip or staying silent. If they don't accept the feedback, then escalate to HR or take other action.
Ask yourself what responsible action you can take within that constraint, such as providing feedback on organizational direction, budgets, or process changes rather than accepting passivity as inevitable.
Encouraging people daily, providing feedback on issues affecting the team, setting boundaries around dysfunction, and taking intentional action to empower positive change are all forms of leadership regardless of your official title.
Our reviewer’s read on each dimension, with quotes from the episode.
The episode offers one structurally interesting distinction - control versus agency - but it is underdeveloped and the surrounding content is almost entirely generic platitudes and throat-clearing. The ratio of filler to actionable idea is very high for an 11-minute runtime.
The goal is not to be in control. That's not the goal. The goal is agency.
if everything is out of my control, eventually nothing is going to feel worth my effort
The framing of 'focus on what you can control' as a potential cop-out shows mild contrarian intent, but the episode never follows through with genuinely fresh thinking - the control/agency distinction is a well-worn coaching concept and every concrete suggestion (give feedback, set boundaries, don't gossip) is entirely conventional.
sometimes we're not choosing wisdom, we're just choosing the plea deal
That is a big difference between self leadership and self protection
This is a solo episode with no guest; the host Chris provides no disclosed credentials, track record, or practitioner experience that would establish authority on executive leadership at any scale.
Welcome back to the Northbound podcast. I'm Chris, your host.
I want to encourage you, I want to encourage you in ways to break out, break out in your organization.
The entire episode operates at a purely abstract level with no named companies, real data, dollar figures, or concrete case studies; the only specific fact offered is a passing etymological note about the 1920s slang origin of 'cop out.'
That phrase is from the 1920s. And I had to look this up
a toxic boss, totally outside of our control. Right. We're like. Or an inconsistent boss behavior.
As a solo monologue there is no interviewing to evaluate; the host poses rhetorical questions to himself but never probes or challenges his own framework, and the episode closes with an extended promotional pitch for the Northbound community rather than substantive content.
When does that advice become a cop out? Because sometimes it's wisdom and sometimes it's a way to quietly surrender.
I want you to leave comments of encouragement and five stars.
Computed from the transcript - who did the talking, and the words that came up most.
Join the Northbound Community Here "You can't control everything - just focus on what you can control." We've all heard that advice. But what if it's not always wisdom? What if sometimes it's a cop-out? In this episode of the Northbound Podcast , host Chris challenges one of the most common pieces of leadership advice and digs into when "focus on what you can control" becomes a way to avoid conflict, responsibility, or hard conversations. Chris explores the difference between control and agency , why staying on the sidelines can be just as damaging as trying to control everything, and how leaders (at any level) can take responsible action - even when systems, bosses, or organizations don't change. If you've ever felt stuck, disengaged, burned out, or tempted to say "that's outside my control," this episode will help you rethink your role, reclaim your agency, and lead with intention - whether you're in charge or not.
Transcribed and scored by The B2B Podcast Index.
Speaker A: You've probably heard the advice, just focus on what you can control. But let me ask you something. When does that advice become a cop out? Because sometimes it's wisdom and sometimes it's a way to quietly surrender. This advice gets repeated at work in leadership and career conversations. And the problem isn't the phrase, it's how we use it. Welcome back to the Northbound podcast. I'm Chris, your host. Today we're talking about that cop out that we maybe have heard that phrase. Just focus on what you can control. And I'm calling it a cop out, but we're going to discuss the balance of it and how to balance it and kind of get a little bit deeper into that. So you know the phrase a cop out? Oh, that's a cop out. That phrase is from the 1920s. And I had to look this up because I wanted to talk about that phrase of focus, uh, on only what you can control as kind of as a cop out. And so I'm like, hey, I wonder where that comes from. And it comes from slang, copying a plea from the twenties. And so in, in legal terms, it was kind of like a way to get out of the tougher fight. Uh, not necessarily admitting guilt, but mostly just risk. You know, risk avoidance or out of fear. Just kind of like avoiding the situation. And. And so from the very beginning, a cop out wasn't about doing nothing. It was really about choosing the easier way out, the easier exit, instead of facing uncertainty or facing conflict or facing some type of legal fight. And so this is kind of where it shows up in the workplace or in leadership is because when we say, I'll just focus on what I can control, that means that, uh, sometimes we're not choosing wisdom, we're just choosing the plea deal. And so the real question here is not focusing on what you can control and whether that's good or bad. It's. It's if I'm using it as an action to avoid something. And that's a big difference between self leadership and self protection. Am I just trying to protect myself or remove myself from this situation or not get involved, maybe stay on the sidelines? And so we label it as, well, that's out of my control. And so here are some things that we sometimes think are outside of our control or we label as outside of our control. Um, a toxic boss, totally outside of our control. Right. We're like. Or an inconsistent boss behavior. We're like, that is outside of my control. That guy is crazy. That's just what he does. He's out of control. And I'm really going to just stay out of it. But it could be also other stuff that's we just don't feel is in our wheelhouse, so to speak, like organizational direction or leadership decisions, budgets, resourcing. And then it maybe even gets kind of personal to people where it's well, I stay out of that, that's somebody else's attitude. Or I stay out of the gossip, or. And then there's performance reviews that, well that's, that's uh, outside of my control. Promotion decisions, outside of my control. Technology changes, process changes. Okay, but sometimes when, but those things still, still impact us, right? So even though we, we were staying on the sidelines on some of those things, those things do relate or affect us in maybe stress, chronic stress or burnout or disengagement or straight up paralysis and reduced initiative. So if everything is out of my control, eventually nothing is going to feel worth my effort. So I stay out. Now, on the other side of it is someone, or maybe uh, the other trap, if you will, is trying to control everything. And this comes to over functioning problems with managing perceptions, trying to influence every decision and every outcome. And at the end of the day the result is really the same, right? You got the same stress, the same burnout, the same disengagement. So whether we give up control, stay on the sidelines, or try to hoard control, the outcome is the same. So the core idea today is to look at control versus agency and we need to define that a little bit. Okay? Because the goal is not to be in control. That's not the goal. The goal is agency. And what this means, control is like forcing outcomes, trying to dictate exactly what happens. The term agency is used here to in a different way. You are choosing intentional actions with within constraints. You're empowering and you're managing your own responses. So there's some self control, there's constraint, and at the same time you're empowering others and um, in many cases empowering yourself, right? So if you're acting in agency, and that's the goal, then the question is what's the next responsible move I can make? Even if the system doesn't change because you may find yourself, man, we find ourselves in this place all the time, right? That is outside of my control. The system isn't going to change or at least doesn't want to change. So what's the responsible move that I can make? And is there a move that I can make responsibly that affects change down the road? Down the road. Sorry. So let's address what's always in your control. And what's always in your control is your responses and how. And whether you communicate with management or with your leadership, you should always communicate with your leadership. Even when they're not really open to it. You need to be able to communicate with your leadership. You can control your personal expectations and definitions of a success, your learning, your effort, your energy investment. You, you control all that. That's all within your span of control. And biggest one of all, you control your boundaries. You are in charge of your boundaries, your time, your emotional labor, your tolerance for dysfunction. Those are boundaries that you are in charge of. So if you're focusing on what you can control, that isn't necessarily a cop out, unless it's helping you avoid hard conversations, boundaries, or decisions that could actually change something. That's what leadership is all about. So you, you want to really take a hard look at whether you're operating out of a desire to just control everything or stay on the sidelines, because both can be bad. You want to see what can I within. You know, you, you, you do want to focus on what your boundaries are. Okay. Like, I'm not going to tolerate that kind of toxic behavior towards me from my leadership or management. Right. That's a boundary that you need to set. And you should not just say, well, that's outside of my control. Now. Uh, that's just how he is. He says those things about me sometimes, or he says those things about other people, or he uses that type of language in the meetings or whatever. That's just how it is. That's outside of my control. No, because that is going to violate a boundary and you should not be okay with that. So understanding that and managing that properly is a good thing. And so then you want to take some time to think. Okay, now, how can I empower positive change, not just staying on the sidelines? What's that thing that I could do to empower other people? One of the biggest ways is just encouraging, just encouraging people on a daily basis. And that is the work of leadership. And that's leadership even when you're not the one in charge. So let's go back to the examples of what we label as out of our control and maybe what we could do instead. If you have a toxic boss, don't tolerate it. What you could do is, I don't appreciate that language. I don't appreciate what you said about me. Give that feedback. Give that feedback. That is okay. And give the feedback directly because we also Talked about gossip, don't be a part of it. One part of gossip can be like, I am so just frustrated with how the boss says this toxic thing all the time. Okay? Rather than telling anybody else about it, tell the boss or the leader now, um, I'm calling it the boss. That kind of is a bad connotation. So the individual in charge, the leader in your office or in your workplace or in your ministry, if they are toxic, they need to know, don't go around them. Now. If they don't accept that feedback, then that may be the time where HR needs to be involved or whatever else. Um, organization direction. The direction of the organization, you have a place in that and that is typically from feedback. If you're not in charge of the direction of the organization, provide feedback. Don't just sit on the, on the sidelines. That's outside of my control. If you see something that needs to change, give that feedback. It's the same thing with budgets and resourcing. If you see things that we commonly label as out of our control, not in my wheelhouse, outside of my pay grade, bring it up. Bring it up in the right form and provide feedback. And don't wait for a performance review to get your own feedback feedback for you. We're not going to wait for the promotion decisions and then we're like, oh, that's outside of my control. Didn't get promoted again or Susie got promoted because she's always going to get promoted or whatever the case may be before that ever happens. Ask for that personal feedback. Find out where you are and what you can do to improve. Don't wait. Don't stay on the sidelines. If you see places for technology and process changes, bring that up. Bring it up. Provide that feedback. You want to bring value to the team. And so if you wait, if you stay on the sidelines, that's going to bring stress, burnout, disengagement and reduced initiative. We don't want that. We are all in this together and your team should view it that way. You're all working together to reach the summit and that's what Northbound is all about. I want to encourage you, I want to encourage you in ways to break out, break out in your organization. And one of the ways that we do that at Northbound is through the Northbound community. And ah, I want to personally invite you, if you are listening today, I want to invite you to the community. If you think the community is just following this podcast, I'm sorry, that's not true. The community is something else. It is more than that, it is a place for us to encourage each other and to share lessons learned with each other. You can also follow along with courses. You can follow along with this podcast. You can follow along with monthly live streams and other live streams that are going on as well. So I really encourage you to be there. Sign up. I'd love to have you there. You will find the link in the description below. Also, I do want you to follow this podcast. I want you to leave comments of encouragement and five stars. Thank you everybody for tuning in today. It's been a pleasure. See ya. Uh, thanks.
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