Beyond the Burnout: Redefining Health and Happiness in Hospitality with Sean Finter, Founder, Hospitality Leadership Coach, Public Speaker

Speaker A: Got a job at a truck stop at the age of 12. And that really amazingly catalyst for my whole career and my whole life. Because part of getting the job entailed having written goals. I thought, man, are you interviewing for a gm? Like, I want to wash dishes here. And I had to, uh, have goals for my family, for school. We were the only one that I knew of in Sydney that had a maximum amount of hours and shifts that you could work a week because people were working like 80 hours. And I just knew it wasn't healthy. So it was like at 50. That was for managers, staff, uh, everything when you got your days off as a manager. And we, we asked our team, we, we surveyed them and said, well, what, what makes it hard to be in this industry? And several of my managers said, when you have a day off, you don't get a day off. People call you and they're, and you're stressed. And he said, you better sit down for a second. And I said, what's happening? And he goes, you're, you're 30 years old and, and you are on a collision course with death. He said, you are in terrible shape. Like, what do you mean? I was, I'm six foot three, you know, my weight right now, I'm about 215 pounds. At the time I was 300 pounds. Um, I drank all of my calories. Now if there's anyone listening that knows that they're headed to, you know, don't have to be like me and wait till you wind up in a hospital. You could go and start your journey now and head towards health.

Speaker B: Hello friends and welcome back to Hospitality Bites. I am your host, hospitality hustler, mompreneur, and the heart behind Hospitality Bites. As you know, this podcast is dedicated to highlighting individuals from all over this incredible industry with intention of humanizing it. And today's guest is doing just that. He has truly built both his career and his life around the hospitality industry, striving to improve it. From washing dishes to leading boardrooms, he's turned every chapter, successes and failures alike into lessons that now guide others. After building a multi million dollar bar group from the ground up, he founded one of the industry's most respected consulting firms in 2001. Bar metrics, helping thousands of operators across the globe creating profitable, sustainable businesses. Drawing from his real life experiences, he has since launched the Fintech Group where he continues to coach leaders and how to build businesses that work for them, not the other way around. He is an author, a sought after global public speaker and a true hospitality lifer and joining me from just across the Bay Bridge is Shawn Finter. Thank you, Sean, for joining me.

Speaker A: Hey, thank you for having me.

Speaker B: I really appreciate it. I'm so grateful to Jamie connecting us. Um, I don't know about you, but with the podcast, it's really kind of fun to meet people from like all over and have these conversations and just the connection to the network is much bigger than I think people realize.

Speaker A: Yeah, no, it's great. I love being a guest and I shoot my own podcast from time to time. Not as regular as you, but I love it too.

Speaker B: It's so fun, right? Like, it's. For me, this is definitely my happy part of my day. I do it once a week. My mom comes over, watches my baby, and I just kind of get to shoot the breeze with people in the industry that are all very different but with the common goal of this industry. Can be tough, but there's a lot of great, wonderful things that come from it too.

Speaker A: Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker B: So your background is very vast and we could go back, you know, 25 years if you wanted to, but kind of give us the brief background of like, when you jumped into the industry, you know, how old are you? I know you were super young. And what has transpired kind of since then?

Speaker A: I was, uh, I was 12 years old and grew up in a small town in Canada. And, uh, I had a couple of jobs at the time. I was, uh, I worked at like a car lot, uh, like cleaning cars on the weekends and I had a big paper route. Um, but the sought after job in my town was like indoors and in a restaurant. So I got a job at a truck stop at the age of 12. And, um, that really amazingly like the catalyst for my whole career, my whole life. Because part of getting the job, uh, entailed having written goals. And I was like, you know, I looked a bit older than 12 when I was 12, but I thought, man, are you interviewing for a GM? Like, I want to wash dishes here. And I had to have, uh, goals for my family, for school. Uh, I wasn't doing very well in school, um, and like, bigger goals in my life. What did I want to do? And the deal was like, my boss, Mr. Panu, said, you're going to work here, but while you're here, you're going to help me achieve my goals and I'm going to help you achieve your goals. And, um, he built just an amazing organization around that. And, uh, it changed my life. You know, just having written goals, having mentors at a young age, um, you Know, school didn't work out for me. I've not graduated high school, um, yet. I didn't realize until I was in my early 20s that I have a, uh, rare form of dyslexia. And uh, I just thought I just wasn't good at school. My mom was French Canadian, my grandmother didn't speak English. And um, you know, I wrote it off to all that. And it turned out I had a pretty severe, um, learning disability that I had to learn to work with. And it's turned out to be a gift. But, uh, I've never left the industry. I went from the truck stop to restaurants, to Hard Rock Cafe. Went to England when I was 19, uh, years old and worked, um, for some big companies there and just put myself beside, uh, amazing mentors. And, um, by the time I was 26 years old, I had traveled to 30 countries and, um, bought my first restaurant when I was 27 years old. So it was quite a ride.

Speaker B: And that first restaurant, you were in Australia, correct?

Speaker A: Yeah, in Sydney.

Speaker B: And you literally took it from bare bottom to. What was the success for you with that?

Speaker A: Well, the. So all the rest, I had eight restaurants within six years. And um, I bought all but one out of bankruptcy. And um, you know, they weren't exactly free. I had to take on some debt with some of them that these businesses owed. And um, you know, most of them, my kind of sweet spot as an operator was like two to six million dollars, uh, locations. I had one uh, that was bigger, two that were bigger than that. But I like that, that space. You can run it with a pretty small team. And, and um, so we took them all from, you know, doing, you know, in their final year before I had them, most of them were doing less than a million dollars, 8, $900,000. And we took an 8 Restaurant Group to nearly $33 million in annual revenue.

Speaker B: It's wild. And you're so young.

Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, I was so young and like the old guy in the team because most of the people that worked for me, that were crazy enough to work for me were like 19, 20, 22 years old. And um, you know, it's interesting, you look at the ethos of a restaurant or a restaurant group and um, you know, I really want to do for, for others what Mr. Panu at the truck stop did for me. And um, you know, the tagline that was coined and it wasn't me that did it, uh, and it didn't even feel good in the beginning. But you know, people going to call this misfits, you Know, we had a lot of people like me that didn't graduate high school. We had people that didn't speak English very well, um, some people with disabilities, like, just. And, you know, my pledge was, if you came here and you did the work and you continue to learn and grow, um, and kind of found out who you were, um, I give you a platform for that. You know, that's, that's what I did, and that's what I continue to do while I had that group. And I continue to do it to this day. And, um, you know, the, the restaurant part, the bar part, um, that's kind of what we did. But it's. It was kind of finding out who we were was the main thrust. And when I sold the, the restaurant group, we had 396 employees at the time when we sold. So we found 400 misfits.

Speaker B: It's funny that you said that. So I call us pirates because we have this weird universal understanding of each other and we can kind of go to any port and you just fit in. Like, you get the, you get those people. You understand each other. We all have very different backgrounds. Um, I was terrible at school, actually. My mom teaches children with ld, like severe dyslexia, dysgraphia, like, all these things. And I was bad at school. Like, I hated high school, I hated sitting in a classroom. I tried college and I just, it was not for me. So that's how I found myself in the industry. And here I am pushing 40 with two little people, and I'm still in it, whether it's, you know, industry adjacent. But I found my people and I felt seen and I felt like I belonged somewhere for the first time in my entire life. And it also can be a huge detriment. Like, for me, it was because I was so absorbed into that restaurant scene of like, work, hard work as much as I can. And then my outside social life was. Then you hang out with those people and then I just drank excessively and I had no understanding of, like, responsibility, really. Honestly, it was. The responsibility was my work and took a serious thing in my life. I got a DUI to be like this. Rinse, repeat, cycle is not good. You need to stop. You're in your 20s. Like, let's reevaluate. Did you have any moments like that where it was like, I need to reevaluate what I'm doing right now or how. How did you. What happened for you?

Speaker A: Well, I, I had several moments. I think the biggest, um, life changing moment is the. My company, we Wanted to put, uh, Keyman insurance on me because I was, you know, I did all. Most of the development and acquisition, and. And, um, so in order to get Keyman insurance, you have to get a pretty thorough, uh, physical. And I hadn't had one before. I had no need to have one. I was only like 29, 30 years old when this was happening. And I went to a doctor and I got. Did, uh, a bunch of tests, and then I got on the treadmill, and he turned the treadmill off, and he said, you better sit down for a second. And I said, what's happening? And he goes, you're. You're 30 years old, and you are on a collision course with death. He said, you are in terrible shape. Like, what do you mean? I was. I'm 6 foot 3, and, you know, my weight right now, I'm about 215 pounds. At the time, I was 300 pounds. Um, I drank all of my calories. So I would drink six, um, to eight coffees a day. I remember the day, the first day I had Red Bull, and I was drinking five, six, eight cans of that a day. Um, I would eat all of my meals standing up, you know, on the fly, running around and working 100 hours a week. Um, I'd sleep in my car, have, like, power naps for 5, 10 minutes at a time. When I got home, though, I couldn't sleep. I'd have a few glasses of red wine to go to sleep. I'd have the Red Bull in the morning to wake up, and I was just in terrible, terrible shape. And, um, you know, I had recently become a father. And I. And I went out, I left the doctor's office. I remember sitting on a bench out front and just crying, just going, like, what. What am I doing? You know, if this is success, I don't want it. You know, I was making more money than I knew what to do with. And, you know, in. In everyone else's eyes, I was super successful. But I. I wasn't. I wasn't good at anything but work. And I just thought I need to make some. Some major changes. And I had assembled a board, and I. And I got my board together. I told them what happened. And. And one of the members of my board repeated something he had said earlier. He said every company that he's been involved with prepared itself for sale. Like, even if you don't want to sell, right, you should be in a position to, you know, in case something happens and whatever else. So I spent, um, the next year, you know, documenting the business and, and like, you know, cutting out the weaker parts and, and all of that. And within six months from that time, I was made an offer for the business that I took. And, uh, I had eight properties. The goal, my business plan, if, if I had one, it would have just said more, right? I just wanted more of more properties, more opportunities, more. Because that was success, right? If you don't have a diploma, you don't, you know, success is whatever people see you doing. And, um, I was made an offer that was very generous. Uh, we didn't even negotiate. We took the offer. And, um, I took a year to get myself back together. I actually moved back to North America. I did made a lot of changes, but I, I believe the doctor. I think I would have died if had I kept up, you know, either fallen asleep behind the wheel, had a heart attack. Um, I was 30 years old. You know, it's no way to live your life.

Speaker B: It's funny. So the Red Bull thing, because I remember when we got Red Bull into our restaurant, um, and then we also had like, some off brand that was kept on the gun. Like, I don't even know what was in it, and it probably was absolutely horrific for you, but we would do shots of them, like, not with alcohol. We would just do shots of energy drinks and the eating standing up and, you know, just like, it's wild to think that that was m. A normal, everyday occurrence. Like you said, you first thing is have caffeine in the morning. But I have to have something to drink to go to bed because I can't rest because my head won't turn off. And then I'm eating terrible. I'm putting just junk in my face because I don't have time to actually sit and have a meal.

Speaker A: Right.

Speaker B: It's interesting. That's what's so crazy about entry. I've never met you in real life, and you have lived, you know, an incredible hospitality industry life. But those stories are just the same across the board, right? There was this no understanding of, uh, we were young professionals. It was a real job, it's a real career. We weren't taking care of ourselves like every other industry in the world does.

Speaker A: Yeah, well, you know what's really funny in hindsight is that early on, like, in our second year with the restaurants, um, we had a woman that worked for me that I really, really liked. She was amazing. And she had, you know, what she described to us as like a nervous breakdown and she was in an abusive relationship. We didn't know about that. Like we just didn't really know her life outside the restaurant. And for the most part she was always very happy when she came in and like, she's just an amazing teammate. And um, when she left us, it really changed me, you know, and I thought, I didn't feel responsible directly for what happened to her, but I knew that the restaurant environment is, is not a healthy place for the most part. You know, it's a very stressful, unpredictable, physical, emotional industry. And I pulled up, I got on my phone here, I pulled up for you today. I thought you might find it interesting. This is what we had in place for our, uh, employees. So think about the life I was living. And then we had this 10 point, um, mandate for our group for our employees. Um, we were the only one that I knew of in Sydney that had a maximum amount of hours and shifts that you could work a week because people were working like 80 hours. And I just knew it wasn't healthy. So it was like at 50, um,

Speaker B: that was your max. You actually had a max.

Speaker A: Yeah, that was for managers, staff, everything when you got your days off as a manager, like, and we, we asked our team, we, we surveyed them and said, well, what, what makes it hard to be in this industry? And several of my managers said, when you have a day off, you don't get a day off. People call you and they're, and you're stressed. So we said, if anyone needs to call them, you have to call me first and then I'll call them. Like, if they really have something that you need, otherwise figure it out. Pretend they're at a funeral. Right. Um, we installed, ah, an amber light in every room at every bar and restaurant that we had. And what that was for, and the guests wouldn't know that it was there, but meant that if you were on the floor or on the bar or in the kitchen and you were stressed and you felt unwell and needed a break, someone's going to cover for you. And it was never to be abused for cigarettes or junk food, whatever. If you, if you don't feel good, if you need a break, we'd give it to you. Uh, number four is, uh, people just were eating garbage. They were coming in and stuff. So we had really good, um, staff meals, healthy staff meal. Everyone got fed every day. Um, we had a sign that said, someone, um, put it up. It said, save your drama for your mama. And it just meant like, no gossip, no bullshit. You got a problem with someone, go and talk to them. Otherwise, just keep your mouth shut. Like, let's not be that company that gossips about people. Um, number six, no dead end jobs. You want to wash dishes for me? Awesome. What's next? You want to manage for me? Awesome. What's next? We're going to help you progress in your career. Number seven, I, I found, I found it boring to do one thing all the time. So everyone had multiple roles and you had to do another shift every other week. So, you know, every 10 shifts you did, ah, you can do a shift in the kitchen, you can do a shift on the host stand. When I was a bartender, I like working the host end, you know. And you stayed in the tip pool, right? So you didn't get penalized for it. Um, number eight is you. Education was mandatory, so we had education on mental health, on physical health, on finance, on every month. You didn't have to come every month. You had to try. And you were expected to do ten educationals, uh, a year. Um, number nine of ten is, um, you had a monthly check in with the management mentally, like, how are you feeling? What needs to change? Is anything on your mind? And so on and so forth. So every person had about five to eight people that reported into them into a member of our leadership team. And number 10, um, no booze. You didn't drink on the property before, during or after the shift. And we only put that in place in year three because one of my bartenders, very attractive woman, she didn't get, she got like accosted on the way home and she didn't feel that she was in a position to take care of herself. And I said, we're not going to do this anymore. I don't want someone to leave here. She had had about five or six drinks in the property. And I just said, and I don't know about you, but I don't make very good decisions when I'm drinking, right? Like, so I got people handling my money in my business, like, we don't need to drink. You want to drink, go to another property after you're done or on your day off or whatever it might be. So we had those 10 things in place and I thought, we're going to lose. We did lose some people. We probably, as we put them in place, my estimation is we lost about 15% of our staff who said, this isn't fun. I, uh, you know, I don't want to work here. I can't tell you how many people came from all over the city, all over the country to work for us. There's just no one else that was providing A healthier. I, um, don't want to say a healthy work environment, but a much healthier than the norm. And they came from all over. So we bought the first place in, like, 2001. So it was like 2001 till 2007,

Speaker B: 2008, and it's 2025, and we're still talking about, um, that our industry is not as healthy as it can be. But there was someone like you, literally 20 years ago doing this, trying to break through. Like, that's. This is what we say. It's a slow burn. Like, this is so hard people to understand. This isn't like a new thing that we've been talking about. There's people like you that have been around for decades trying to talk about, like, this is a great industry, that we have to do better. Like, my mind, when I tell you my mind is blown right now that you're telling me that you had these in place. Uh, when I was entering the industry as a very young teenager, probably how much safer I could have been as a young woman. Um, you know what I mean? Just, I will say as a teenager and being so naive and unaware of responsibilities, and the adults in the room were acting terribly. Had there been, like, real structure like that, how much more successful I could have been early on and not. But you know what? We all have to live through stuff. I've been through it. But I am truly, like, I have very few words to say how impressed I am m. That you implemented that in that time. In that time period.

Speaker A: Well, uh, thank you. But, you know, I. We did it because we thought it was the right thing to do. I coach bar and restaurant operators today and, and encourage them heavily. Seriously encourage them to do it, because it's a massive competitive advantage. You want to get great people that'll stay in the industry way longer, that'll give you their best five shifts a week, and you're going to provide a better environment for them to work in. And, yeah, there's people that want to party, that want to drink. Cool. They can work down the road. But, you know, I just think it's. We, we, like, I'm a big. I'm a geek. I love the numbers. And so, you know, I had a consulting firm outside of my restaurant group, so I had the numbers on a lot of other businesses, and we outperformed, um, every business that I had numbers on. Um, with about 80% of the staff, right. We had 20% less staff because we had all a players. We had people that just took their job seriously. You Know, they didn't spend time messing around in the, walk in or out, out front smoking, you know, they didn't spend time gossiping. They came in, um, we, we were, you know, where a lot of groups were big on cocktails, food or cool fit out. We were, we were a hospitality group. We liked, you know, uh, our, my belief is that hospitality is, is how a person feels about themselves while they're in your company. Right? So I wanted people to feel seen, to feel important, to feel respected, you know, at the highest end, to feel loved. They come in and can you love a stranger? Yeah, I can love a stranger. I can make them feel loved while they're with us. And, and so we taught that, we taught people how to do that. We taught them, you know, how to adapt to a guest when they walked in. I would take a young person, 19 year old host and I'd work with them and there'd be a group of two people, a couple approaching the door and I'd say, what, what's their energy level at? You know, what, what do you rate them at? And they go uh, an eight. And I'd say okay, why, why do you think that? And they go, oh, now that I look at them as six, I said, yeah, I'd agree, it probably is six. And then our job is to take them two levels up while they're with us, right? We want to meet them where they're at, mirror their energy, mirror their language, get out in front of them. And you know, no one coming from a funeral wants to be greeted by a clown, right? And no one coming from their promotion wants to be treated like it's a funeral. So we match that energy and then our job is to bring them a couple levels up while they're with us. And that's, that's what we did in Sydney. And, and we turned eight businesses around and, and I believe we made an impact in 400, more than 400, we had 400 active employees. So we had hundreds more than that over the years. Um, looking back today, we have that. I know of over 40 of those people are business owners today, either in part or they own a whole business. So that was the other hidden goal with us, is that we, you know, I encourage any, anyone that owns a business to say, okay, people are going to come and work for you. You're going to trade time and effort for money. But if there's something more than that. And I thought back then, what's the one thing that I can give away? Low cost for high impact. And my Promise to them was if you come and work for me for three years, I will show you how to run a business from the ground up. I'll show you how to write a proposal. I'll show you how to negotiate. I'll show you how to do inventory. I'll show you how to do a schedule. I'll show you how to deal with the bank. You'll learn the whole thing. There was a whole roadmap to doing that. Not everyone wanted to, and that's fine, but most people did. And then they took that back to their family business. They took it. You know, we all have something in addition to what we're doing, and if you give that away, you're. You're in really good shape.

Speaker B: Man. Jamie, when she said you were incredible, like, I'm truly just in awe of you, really get this. Like, you totally understand this industry. You understand it from the physical, mental aspect of it all, but also that this really is a career and it's something to be proud of. Like, I was so ashamed to be a waitress when I was younger because people would come in that, like, went to college and they were back, you know, having fun, and I was serving them, and it's embarrassed. I was embarrassed because I did not see the potential until much later. Like, and I'd been in about that point, 10 years. Took a long time for me to say, like, oh, I'm good at this and I'm gonna do something with it and I'm gonna keep pushing forward. I'm gonna figure out other things and other avenues. Um, and I can see why people reach out to you to come do public speaking, because it's. I feel so empowered talking to you, just hearing you say that you believed in people, no matter where they started and when they came into the industry or whatever it is, that there was an option for them beyond that. Like, that's truly remarkable. And I, I wish I had met you a long time ago, because I would probably been a lot better off. Um, but I know you also had some serious, like, pitfalls too, and, like, really life changing moments. Is it possible to talk about that flight and what that was like for you?

Speaker A: Yeah. So the, as I mentioned, the catalyst to, like, selling my restaurant group, and I should have said that it was meant to be a break. You know, I was meant to go back to being a retailer. And because I loved, I loved serving our guests, I love serving our team. But I kind of found another path. I. I started, uh, Bar Metrics while I had the restaurant group. Um, it Took me, like, all over the world. You know, I, I, we, we had 26 offices in eight countries around the world. So I feel like Forrest Gump. Like, I just can't believe it even happened. You know, it just started on my kitchen table. And then Sydney and Melbourne and grew and then, and then Canada, the UK and Brazil, Spain, England. Like, we just, it just grew and grew. Um, and while I had that business and was growing that I was traveling a lot, probably too much, and, um, I was, uh, I was at a point where, um, you know, I just, I had got healthy, and then I got unhealthy again, you know, in a different way. This time more mentally. I was just run down and, and, um. They say, like, bad things happen in threes. So I had a, um, an experience where I had issues with my business partner. I, um, was going through a divorce, which, you know, I'm an adopted kid, so all I ever wanted to do is be a family. And it just was. I never thought I would be divorced. And then, um, and then I had an issue with another business that I had an investment in, and, um, the partner stole from me. And that, you know, was as bad as anything. You know, like, bank account was cleared out. And, um, so, you know, I got to a point where, you know, it all felt like it happened at once, and I was really run down, and I was back to, you know, working a lot of hours and run down. And somehow, like, I just didn't learn my lesson the first time, like, about, you know, with your, your tank, um, running on empty. And then what happens when you got to go, like, hard and to save yourself or to dig in, and, and, um, I was literally flying, um, to Brazil to do a, um, a talk for a public company for, like, that was like their regional summit. So, like, hundreds of leaders I already postponed because the divorce. And basically they said next postponement, you got to cover the cost, which would be hundreds of thousands of dollars. So I got on that plane, and the minute I got on the plane, I knew I was in trouble. You know, I was, like, in really bad shape. And, um, I landed in Miami, connected to Sao Paulo, and, um, I never even got through customs. I saw the customs agent. I found myself running. I had to go to the rubbish bin, and I threw up, and it was all blood. Um, so I didn't know I had, um, you know, stomach ulcers. And one of them had ruptured, and I passed out. And I woke up in an ambulance. And if you've ever been in an Ambulance in a foreign country. It's just like the movies. Like, they make a different noise, they look differently inside. And I'm being taken, um, to the hospital now. My handler was there from the company who was there to receive me. Um, of course there's an ambulance attendant, but there's two cops in that thing. I'm like, why. Why is there police in the ambulance with me? It's because I was illegal in the country. I hadn't gone through customs yet. So, um, anyhow, I, uh, had to go to the hospital for a couple days to get stabilized. You can't fly with internal bleeding. And, um, naively, I thought, I just need a couple days off. Like, that's all I need to fix myself. And so I flew home. Um, I was in really bad shape. I knew it. And I just wanted to be home. I have a. I live on the water. I have a dock and my dog. And I just thought, you know, I'm going to be fine here. And a friend of mine, bunch of friends came over to check on me and. And look after me. And my friend had just lost his best friend to suicide. And, uh, he said, john, you have a lot of the symptoms that he had before he took his life. And I said, what, are you crazy? Like, you know. And, um, he said, I'm not leaving you until you agree to go to the hospital. I need you to go get checked out. And that night, um, to this day, I don't know if I was asleep or awake. I feel like I was asleep, but I remember it so graphically. I might have been awake, but I remember I'm at Franklin House now, a property that I. A leadership property, own in Annapolis. And I was here, and I was driving back to my house, which is only eight miles from here, and the guy accelerated into this big column of a. Of a bridge. And I know that sounds terrible, but I had the most euphoric, beautiful feeling of my life. Like, just this release of, like, all the pressure. And I just felt so good. And. And I called my friend into the room and told him what had happened. And he started crying, and he said, we're going to the hospital. And I went to, um, a mental facility to be checked out. And I spent eight days in there. And, um, you know, when I was there, I felt like, this is so humiliating and embarrassing, and it's like Hotel California, where you can check into a mental hospital, but you don't get to leave when you want, um, unless you get a judge in a court order. And so I was When I was being checked into the hospital, um, so graphic in my memory, um, they took my shoelaces and my belt and I'm like, no, I'm okay. And they're like, no, we have to do this. And the attendant said to me, whose belt is this? I said, it's my belt. And he held it up and it had like eight holes that I had punched. I barely remember. I just, I hadn't eaten for, for months. Um, and. And so I kept punching a hole with whatever and just to keep my pants up because. And they weighed me and they said, how much do you weigh? And I told them and they're like, when did you weigh that? And I said, I think that's what I weigh now. They're like, no, no, you're like 60 pounds lighter than what you're saying. So I had lost 60 pounds. Um, I went in there and you know, for those. I hope not everyone gets to see the inside. It was a very nice facility, uh, world class facility. But there's all kinds of people in there. Um, there was a woman in there who was like, ah, head of, uh, for the region of um, fema and just cracked under the pressure. There was a, uh, woman in there who had a passion, uh, for throwing chairs in the air and watching them land and like all kinds of people. But, but I can tell you this, it was, it was, it was good for me. You know, um, the first thing that I noticed was like, I just, I stopped like reaching around and uh, stopped looking for my phone. Right? Like that was like on day two or day three. And I thought, what a gift to have that thing away. Nothing buzzing, nothing vibrating. Um, I ate three meals a day. Didn't have to think about it, just ate three. The, the food they put in front of me or in the cafeteria. I went to classes about like, my mental health and, and like, you know, creating space for yourself and, and exercise and, and you know, uh, healthy people in your life, like, reviewing that every few years, like, people change and you change and your circumstance changes. Um, you know, I, they talked about like looking for the symptoms. Like what, you know, when, like we don't have a valve that says you're getting to the Redstone. It's like, so how do you know when you're in the orange? And. And I thought to myself, why, why has no one ever talked to me about this before? Like, why don't they talk about this in high school? To say that you're going to be stressed at some point in your life if you're not already. And this is how you look for it. This is what you do about it. And, um. So when I was on day eight, I was released. And to be honest, I was scared to leave as much as I wanted to. I was scared, like, you know, I had a routine and I was safe and, like. And the world was out there. My phone was out there, my businesses, my kids. And, uh, this nurse, um, this beautiful, heavyset black woman. Um, I saw her every day, and she didn't speak much. You know, she wasn't unkind to me, but she just wasn't very talkative. And on the eighth day, when I was packing my little bag, she sat on the bed beside me, which I found very strange. Like, the staff don't sit on your bed. They don't like. And she sat down beside me and she said, um. She said, are you okay? And those. Those words made me cry because I didn't know. I said, I don't know if I'm okay. And, um, she said, what's the one thing that you're going to change as a result of being here? I've been writing in my journal every day a thousand things. And I said, I don't know. And she put her hand on my hand and she said, oh, sweetheart, don't waste a good tragedy. She said, you got to change something. That's what this place is for. You got to figure out that one thing that you've got to change. And, um, my ride was waiting for me outside, and I went back to my diary. I didn't want to leave without, uh, circling something. And the thing that I circled as I said, you know, I had written in my diary that I'm so lucky. Like, I've got money and opportunity, and, like, I'm still doing things that are hurting me. And I said, I'm not going to do anything moving forward that's unhealthy for me. I'm just going to make decisions based on my mental health first and everything else after that. Because if I can't take care of myself, I can't take care of anybody else. And I've lived true to that. I've said no to hundreds of opportunities since. I've turned down hundreds of trips. I'm like, I'm good. I got my family, I've got my fiance. I've got everything that I need, and I don't need to take any unnecessary risk. So it was, um, a huge, um, turning point in my life. And. And, um, you know, part of why I talk about it. Today, and I've been on stage this year in Dubai and Montreal and all around the States, is to hopefully tell people they don't need to go to a hospital to learn these lessons, right? Like, this is life. And we're all going to be in a tough spot one day. And even if you don't think you are, like, I did not think I would ever be in an ambulance in Brazil, be in a hospital in Baltimore. Like, I just thought, uh, I was invincible. And I am not. And neither is anybody else. It's just sadly a matter of time.

Speaker B: The reason why I say I want to humanize hospitality is because we forget, like, as humans, nobody's perfect. And we all are going to live through things that are, like, testing us. And we can put on a brave face as much as we want, but when you fall down, you can either stay down and let it keep eating you and you keep letting eat you alive, or you can find that bright spot and, like, get yourself back up and, like, what is the one thing that will push you forward or that you want to change? Like, you said what she said to you, like, that's huge. Like, hang on to that one thing that you want to change. And, like, don't look back, because our life is this big. You know, we only have this much time here, and there's so much good that we can do with it. And I said to yesterday, you know, what I level, what I measure as level of success now is, like, happiness. Like, I want to be happy. I'm a mom with two beautiful children. But I was not happy two years ago, you know, a year and a half ago. And, you know, hearing you say I was getting very emotional because you're a father to four beautiful children. And, um, you know, our kids need us, but we give so much of ourselves that it's really hard to remember we got to get back, like, to ourselves in some capacity. Like, they need us to be here, but we have to take care of ourselves. And, um, I think it's incredible that you're willing to share, like, the darkest part of your life and the scariest part of your life. Because the more we humanize that this happens all the time, you hope that it saves one person. Um, because there's just like this weird. We're afraid to talk about real shit. Like, life, right, is real. We are real people. Um, and I. I just seriously, I'm like, truly my breath. I have, I'll say. Cause I ironically say has been a really rough morning for me. It's been a Rough week. And so just hearing you say how rock bottom you were, and it wasn't really your first rock bottom, which is you had several signs of, like, you were heading to rock bottom and how terrifying that must have been for you and your family. Um, I'm just happy that you're doing well and that you are using your real life, personal, professional experiences to share with others. Um, like at the Burnt Chef, people are afraid to talk about the dark stuff. We don't want to talk about the industry being dark and scary. But you said it. These are kids entering the industry. And as kids, we have to teach them that life can be really scary, it can be really stressful and very messy. But we have tools and resources to help you get through those things because you matter so much. You matter to be here. We need you here and your life is important. So we gotta shake this, like, pretty close thing and, like, lift it off. Like, this is the messy stuff. But there's a lot of beautiful things in there, too. Um,

Speaker A: a lot of people. Uh, well, myself, certainly, you know, I knew I was in trouble and I didn't, um, not seek help out of ignorance. I, I did that out of fear. Right? I worried that this is bad, but what's going to be taken away from me if I, you know, show my weakness, um, have the stigma of being mentally unwell, attached to me. And, um, you know, the one thing I, I want everyone listening to know is that all of my fears and all of my assumptions were wrong. Right? Like, I, I. And I'm not saying it's going to be the case for everyone, but, um, I thought my staff would leave. They just leaned in and helped me and, and did more than I asked them to do. During that time, I thought, um, I had contracts with public companies. I thought, surely they have. I'm a tiny little company. They can find someone else and cut and run. That not only stuck with me, they gave me time. And the following year, they more than doubled the contract and suggested that I talk to people right, about it because maybe I could help others avoid what had happened. Uh, I worried that my friends would think less of me. And I think a couple did, right? And they're no longer friends. Like, everyone gets sick, right? If I, if I declared that I, I, you know, had diabetes or cancer, like, people rally around you, like, saying that I have mistreated myself and put myself in a terrible position, that, that I've literally got chemically unwell, um, who could back away from you? Like, wouldn't you lean in and help your friends. Like, that's what most of my friends did. And some, to an extent, that would bring me to tears if I talked about what they did. For me, um, my family worried how my kids would look at me. And I think that it's very healthy that I didn't hide this away in a closet to say that, like, even your dad, who's strong and even your dad can get sick. And some people get sick just because they get sick, and other people get sick because they make themselves sick. And, you know, when I look at the whole gamut, like, talking about it and getting help, which is the hardest part, especially in this country. Right. Like, there's. There, there are mechanisms available. I've talked to a lot of people about getting help, and sometimes that help isn't what they need.

Speaker B: It's.

Speaker A: It's not the right help. It's unaffective or whatever else. Just gotta keep trying. Right? Just like if you're trying to get in shape and you're looking for the right trainer or the right diet or whatever, just gotta keep trying until you. And sometimes just the act of trying is making things better. Yeah, right. It's just awareness and forward momentum and not sitting in the darkness and, and getting. Getting sicker. So, you know, if there's anyone listening that, that knows that they're headed to, uh, you know, don't. You don't have to be like me and wait till you're wind up in a hospital. You know, you could go and start your journey now and, and head towards health.

Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, I just love everything that you shared. I'm so glad that you did. Um, and we got to talk, like I said a little bit yesterday about, you know, your, Your consulting, your program now that you're running and giving people true experiences, um, and that life is so much more than, like, the four walls of your restaurant. How did you kind of come up with this idea of blending, showing people the world and like, showing them these incredible things? I mean, I don't want to blow. I want, I want you to share. What is that you do that's so special at your consulting group?

Speaker A: Well, I, you know, what I, What I try to do is there's about eight different areas of business I work exclusively on business fundamentals. Right. I'm not a tech guy. I don't know a single recipe. You know, I, you know, I, I work on, you know, hr. Like I said, like, if, if you can, you know, we, we had, for example, in the program that we had, like, I just talked about the mental health part. But we did a lot for our staff because they did a lot for us. And we had uh, we measured like quality uh, qualified applications per job opening. We were averaging 28 people to select from for every job opening. And how many people do you hear that say I can't find good people? We couldn't find, you know, we couldn't place all the great people that were coming to us because we were doing things a little differently. So we do everything from hr, uh, optimization at peak hours because that's a cash machine for a business. 80% of sales come from 20% of hours of operation. So if you get that right, kind of takes care of a lot of other things. So we do, we do that. We have a whole gamut um, of of courses. Um, we. It's group coaching. So you're with um, a group of 20 or 30 other people. They can get one on one time with me if they want it. But for the most part we meet a couple times a week for an hour, uh, at a time. And uh, and we do like three major projects a year. Um, so we're just finishing up the speed and efficiency like optimization piece. We did HR earlier in the year from how to attract the right side. Who do you know who you're looking for? Right, like good people. We prefer people without hospitality experience. We like retail experience, but not specifically hospitality because came with a lot of bad habits often. So uh, we teach them how to attract, how to interview, um, and how to find that true person in the interview process and then decide like can you help them? If they work for you for three years, would they be three years older or would they be three years better off? Is what you have to offer important to them? Uh, then we do like 100 day induction program, then ongoing education, uh, right through to exit interviews. Right. So that's like the HR module. And next trimester we meet three times a year. We're going in 10 days to tequila Mexico, a place that I love. We take the group there, we take over this hotel right between three distilleries. It's gorgeous. The food, mariachi bands like we study. In the morning we go tequila tasting. And all my friends are distillers out there. They own the businesses. So we do that a, uh, few times a year. Um, in the group we have obviously a lot of Americans, Canadians, British, um, Germans, Australians all over the world. And uh, the Australians have to get up at 4 o' clock in the morning. They don't miss a call. And uh, so yeah That's. That's the group. But the kind of parallel thing with it is, you know, I did a lot of consulting when I. When I sold the restaurants. And after, like, my 20th job, I realized that all these businesses that were in trouble had one thing in common. With the exception of one place, the people that were running them were sick. They just weren't healthy. And it's very hard to have a healthy business when you're unhealthy yourself. You just make a lot of bad decisions. You don't attract good people. You know, you could be going through a divorce, alcohol rundown, like I was, whatever it might be. So I say to the guys in the group, like, let's start with. With getting you healthy. You know, what does that mean to you? What do you need? People know what they need to change, right? What are you willing to change? Are you willing to try it for six months? Then let's start getting your leadership team healthy, Then let's get your staff healthy, and then we could do these other things. You know, if you're sick, you very rarely see someone win the super bowl and the coach is an alcoholic and going through a divorce, right? Like, got to be on top of your game if you want to win the game.

Speaker B: And one of our ambassadors, Imran, talks about, like, the physical wellness and why it's so important, like, your physical health. Like, about, we're athletes. I mean, I could do a little better job, however. But, you know, running a restaurant is a lot of work. It's like stamina that's unseen in a lot of places. And to your point about, if the leader is not in the healthiest place, then that just repeats to the next tier down and then some on and so on. And then you have, like, a big mess on your hands when, like, say, things hit the fan. How are you handling it? Can you handle it? Do you have the tools to handle it? Um, are. And I love. They said, are you willing to make changes? That's like, a huge thing for people. Are you willing to address what it is and then make that change to better yourself and then better your business and the team of people that work for you? Um, it's a very stressful job. I. It's. Oh, um, man, I could talk to you probably for hours because I'm just so inspired by what you're saying. And this world that you've created, um, especially that's on a global scale. Like, not a lot of people can say that. What's that like for you, knowing that you're Helping people from all over the world.

Speaker A: I, I love it. I love the opportunity to um, to help people anywhere they are. You know, this, this career for me, like from a small town in Canada of 2,000 people, I've uh, this year I've traveled uh, to my 60th country and I've spoken on stage in 35 countries around the world. So I did one contract with the Asho. I wrote a book that I sold them the rights. So I'm an unpublished author, but I have a lot of friends that are published that made no money. This book made a lot of money. Um, and we took that to 55 countries around the world and I went to like 28 or 29 than myself to launch. Um, I love, I love the opportunity, I love to travel. I'm very curious and, and my fiance now, um, she was a single mom, didn't get a chance to, to travel. She just told me the other day that now she's been, she'd only ever, I think only ever been to Mexico before we met five years ago and now she's been to 18 or 19 countries. So she's uh. Yeah, she loves it like I do. And, and you know what, like lots of people travel for work and you know, it can be fun or not. Um, ours, like our last trip we just got back from, did um, a gig with uh, Jameson for four days. Um, the group was 50 people from around the world that I was the keynote speaker at and I work with them like every morning and at breakfast with the group. But it's 50 kind of leaders from around the world. We uh, stayed at a castle in Ireland, like went horseback riding, went to the Middleton distillery which is one of the prettiest places in, in uh, the world. Um, you know, just world class people. It was amazing. So that's what we get to do now. And it's uh, all because of this.

Speaker B: Did you say the Middleton Distillery? Yeah, the people that created like a town around the distillery. Is that you're talking about at the same place?

Speaker A: Yeah, Middleton, just um, outside of Cork.

Speaker B: This is very random but I actually when they, they reached out to me a long time ago when I worked for the Berghoff and they asked for like a quote and to use one of our images from the Berghoff in Chicago to use there. And um, I was just in like infatuation with this concept that they had about the whole company and the brand and their community. Um, and that is literally on my bucket list of things to do is, is to go there. Oh yeah, that's incredible that you guys got to do that.

Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. The guy that runs it's Tony. I can put you in touch with him. It's called the, um. What do they call it? The. The Jameson Experience. And you go, and last year, we did it as well. We started in Dublin, went to Cork, then went to Middleton. Um, stayed at the Castle as well. And it's just the people are from, like, all all over the world, and it's super special.

Speaker B: And that you're doing it with your other half of, you know, that you're going to spend your life with. I mean, how beautiful is that? That's my dream, is to do things with the person I love, with my husband. And like I told you yesterday, taking my children around the world to experience all different cultures, all different foods and different dining experiences. You know, everything I want them to have. Just like I said, life's too short. I want them to experience it all. Um, and I'm truly in awe of you. I think this is incredible. I'm so excited to see everything that you're probably going to work on, continuing on. So what is next for you? Is there anything big that you can share or how can people get in touch with you, maybe to be a part of that?

Speaker A: Yeah. So we. Right now, I was writing a book, and it got broken into two, which I wasn't thrilled about, but it's turning out, uh, great. I love the writing process. Um, so writing two books at the moment, um, we'll launch one, um, before the end of the year, and then probably do like, a book tour for a year. And I'll continue to coach. That's probably my. My big passion because you get to, you know, I get to work on all the things that I'm good at and don't have to touch anything that I'm not. And, um, and then it's just. The best part is just seeing it, you know, come to life. I tell people, we are not a, uh, education company. We're an implementation company. We're messy. Get in, get it done. Like, you know, if people. The only reason people get kicked out of the group is that they're not doing the work. Like, you got to put it in place, bring a team member in. They could be part of the group and we'll do that. But I love seeing the results. And, um, it's a lot of fun. I love getting together. This house is for that. They come here a couple times a year, and then we do one road trip. This. This year. It's. It's Mexico next year we're going to go to Europe. And um, yeah, it's, it's cool. You can find out about it. Ali. It's got a site up. It's um, well, it's just SeanFinter, uh, dot com. So s e A N F I N T R and that'll tell you about the group and, and what we do. Um, for people that are interested, we do a totally free, like a diagnostic of, of your business. Um, I, you know, we do this for two reasons. One, to make sure that it's for you and then there's a 25 minute interview. And uh, the reason we do it is I'm pretty sure I'm the only coaching company in the industry that offers a money back guarantee. I just, if it doesn't work, you know, we get results and so therefore I have to make sure that it can work. Um, I want to pay my clients. I want to be an asset, not a, not a liability to the business. And if I don't see a clear path to getting you a multiple on the return, then, you know, I might be able to point you to somebody that can or just give you some resources that will help you out, but just want to work with people that, uh, we believe we can help.

Speaker B: Wow, that's very powerful. Well, I want to thank you, Sean, for joining me and being so vulnerable, not just with the show, but just in your life. Because you truly are going to change people's lives and make them feel seen. I'm sure you know that, but it's. I want to reiterate how important is. So thank you so much. I want to thank everyone for listening today's episode. Please be sure to check out my friends at Walk and Talk Talk Media for all their amazing content, including this distribution of this podcast. Please visit hostilitybytes. Com to learn more about me, the podcast and my upcoming documentary. As I always say, please be kind to yourself and one another. Thank you, Sean.

Speaker A: Thank you. It's great talking to you.